-PHOTO AND EDITS BY RUTH RADER-
This is how it looked in the small city that I was in, a few weeks ago. I've moved about twenty-miles down the road from there and this is what I saw outside of the window, today:
The sky was gray and cloudy but the grass was green, today. And even though it is only the beginning
of March and we are under a Winter Storm Watch...everyone around here is thinking about Spring.
It was so peaceful in this room, today. I turned-off the flatscreen and focused on editing photographs, catching up on my email and fixing my phone.
I am now far away from filthy toilets, tracks of black mold creeping up the side of a trailer wall, dirt-
caked floors and the garbage dumps that some people actually thought that I would pay $350.00 a month to live in.
I am no longer pretending to sleep on a squeaking red cot or pulling paper towel out of the dispenser before I lay my toothbrush down on the edge of a sink. Nor am I trying to dodge raindrops while I sit in a sleeping bag in a damp parking lot in the middle of the night..
I am also not in the apartment that I counted on moving into...the place where I thought that I would start my life again...or continue it with some wonderful results.
The yuppie couple who first promised me a new place to launch all of my dreams...backed-out of the deal at the last minute. And that cold, callous cut into my life has had a devastating effect on me.
I believe that I saw the deepest point of that City's ugly when that happened...and I never want to see it, again.
Now I am caught between the Christian exploiters and those who would sell their soul for a hit of Meth.
My heart is broken and my trust in those who told me to "keep the faith"...is shattered. And the pieces are now just swirling around...and I am left...caught in the crossfire.